Bible 101: Names! In the Bible! Names in the Bible!

Because you deserve a little treat.

Ladies. Gents. Cyborgs. Lizard People.

Welcome to a Special Edition of Back to Basics (with me, your humble Reverend Doc).

I’ll be the first to say that this year has been a real doozy thus far and we could all use the much needed respite. So, here we are.

Let me explain to you one very small fact that I mention, inevitably, every time I post on Substack or Spotify:

The Bible wasn’t written in English.

I know, it’s shocking.

If you are one of the few who have been here from Zero Dark Thirty, you are probably giving me the middle finger from a distance because you’re tired of me saying that.

But, I won’t stop.

I can’t stop.

It’s that important.

Plus, you hearing a god-zillion times makes it like spilled glitter in your brain (you can’t get rid of spilled glitter). Ironically, we have a lot of bias when we read our English translated Bible without really realizing it.

We read a word like “bread” and think food, but the ancient people?

Nah.

They knew it meant nourishment, commitment, devotion…or all three combined.

See what I mean?

Listen, this isn’t going to be that kind of Substack today.

Today…

On this glorious Thursday…

I am going to tell you how the names of the Bible were actually pronounced.

"Why, Reverend Doc?”

Because I want to…and it’s funny. Do you really need another reason? Exactly.

NAMES! OF THE BIBLE!

Hebrew:

Adam = uh-dom

Cain = ka-yin

Seth = shay-th

Joseph = yo-safe

Abraham = av-rah-hom

Sarah = saw-raw (this one always makes me laugh)

Moses = mo-sheh

Joshua = yeh-ho-shoo-ah

Aaron = ay-ay-ron

….no, but that would’ve been hilarious, right?

Aaron = a-hair-own

David = daw-veed or daw-vid

Solomon = shell-o-mo

Jeremiah = year-me-yaw or year-me-yahoo (not a joke, believe it or not)

Joel = yo-ayl

Greek:

Matthew = ma-thigh-yos

Mark = mar-kos (no no, not Marcus…mar-KOS)

Jesus = ee-ay-sooce

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Quick Tidbit w/ the Reverend Doc: Remember that Jesus was fluent in Aramaic, Greek and Hebrew, but this is the Greek equivalent. The Hebrew equivalent happens to be where we get the Greek “Jesus” from, which is yeh-ho-shoo-ah. Sound familiar? It’s how you say Joshua’s name and means “Jehovah is salvation.”

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Luke = loo-kos (no no, not LUCAS!)

John = e-o-on-ace (this is a doozy)

Saul = sow-los

…who then turned into…

Paul = pow-los

Timothy = tee-moth-e-os

Zacharias = za-akh-ree-us (the sound of “akh” sounds like popcorn stuck in the back of your throat)

Simon = Simone (maybe he was named after his Grandma?)

…who turned into…

Peter = pet-ras (ROLL THE R!)

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Go read with confidence. Thanks for being here.